1. |
meatcore
01:47
|
|||
|
Inside the crisis I wait
Turns out the answer’s in your meat
God wrote the answer on the soles of your feet
God wrote the answer in your meat
God wrote the answer in your breath
God wrote the answer in your step
Human only in motion
Human only responding
Human only in poems
Poetry only in looking
Looking only in motion
Walk with your skull busted open
Blood anchor for the ship in me
Blood blanket for the babe in me
Blood prophet for the god in me
|
||||
2. |
prayer for general use
04:36
|
|||
3. |
||||
|
the novel of a life read flat and all at once
floating in the world I made
product of decisions bad and good
time is wasted, time is nothing
hope this finds you well
may your body flourish
may your altering hands tie felicitous knots
floating in the world of consequences
acting with the curtain down
all the time it takes to build the finest acids
the novel of a life read flat and all at once
|
||||
4. |
||||
|
this is the charm to help you keep working
this one'll get you through the day
this one'll make you finish your homework
even if you got nothing else to say
this is the one that makes you lean forward
this is the day when you hurt your head
trying to open the door that won't open
this one'll get you out of bed
this will erase the humiliation
this'll consign it to history
this'll make every day a fresh problem
the way that a day is supposed to be
and you can say if I get a concussion will it make me forget not to hit my head
|
||||
5. |
a lot of mistakes
01:22
|
|||
|
I made a lot of mistakes
and the older I get the more mistakes I make
and the older I get the more I adjust my fantasy solutions to already committed mistakes
so my alpha life is trailed by a succession of secondary adjusted lives
each layer further removed from reality than the last
none of which realities I get to experience because I'm stuck in the alpha life but each of which presents a separate sequence of memories which eat the life I'm currently experiencing
to the general confusion of all who share my consensus reality
Fuck!
|
||||
6. |
||||
|
[distantly muttering william stafford]
you gave me the poem to read
you never understood it
I drag it out to tear it down
and find it holds the key I need to live in
I could never let you go
I'll forever hold the things you told me
The things that made me
Meet me in another place
Meet me in a safer way
Put down your defenses
And I could be of some use to you yet
I bet I could
I'll forever let you go
I'll forever hold the things you told me
That's how I'll make me
God let me be wise enough to speak
Let me tell the world yes no or maybe
|
||||
7. |
||||
|
Who will make the sun come back
When our parents cannot sing
Who will turn the light on
When the night is everything
The ritual sustains us
But the priests are all in jail
The ritual sustains us
But we don’t remember where
Who will make the sun come back
When our people drown in sin
Who remembers kindness
When the night is everything
The ritual sustains us
But our mothers fed us poison
The ritual sustains us
But I remember now
I will make the sun come back
Because I learned to sing
You will turn the light on
You’re the light in everything
The ritual sustains us
And the ritual is ours
|
||||
8. |
curse for cowardice
02:12
|
|||
|
The pretty things you left weren’t worth the damage you inflicted
You left your living ledger in the red
You might have made it right if you had stuck around to fix it
You might have made it right but now you’re dead
Using other people is as simple as addiction
You always think you’re better when you’re clean
The treatment for the illness is a life of constant vigilance
A life you won’t abandon in midstream
There’s a hole in the center of everything
And it hurts and it hurts and it draws you in
And the ones who live in the thick of it
They learn to fucking deal with it
There’s a hole in the center of everything
And you took one look and you fell right in
And you left your mess for the rest to clean
On the edges of the center of everything
|
||||
9. |
slippery hitch
05:48
|
|||
10. |
||||
|
sorry! my bad!
I will admit I did not fully appreciate the freedom to stay at the worst hotels
I did not appreciate the theft of a single french fry from a friend
I did not appreciate airports
I was not appropriately grateful for the mosh pit the crowd chant the bar fight the restaurant
I did not know the joy of pilgrimage until I could not make it
Did not know the weight of promises til I could not keep them
Hashem you are generous
Thank you Lord for protecting me from unwelcome hugs and family gatherings
Thank you for helping me appreciate what I have lost
Thank you for the knowledge of what was important
|
||||
11. |
wand of catharsis
08:26
|
|||
12. |
||||
|
something in this mess worth protecting
and the darkness around us, it is what it is
and I look straight into that dark night
if I see you or not it's all right
something in this death persisting
I brushed the root with my palm
and felt the persistence of life underneath
the dreadful enveloping calm
all the words I can spare
to shore up a shred of connection
all under the whip of a dead generation
fuck you man I'm capable of love
|
||||
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